In Next Month's Issue of the Prestigious Journal:
- Global Wildlife Summit adopts trade protections for overharvested manta rays. The Tampa Devil Rays are demanding to be included.
- NASA's Mars Curiosty has suffered a "memory glitch" which is common in aging space craft. The Rover forgot where it put the keys.
- Increasing numbers of manatees (no relation to manta rays) are being killed by deadly algae blooms. Sea cows have decided to evolve into land mammals and migrate to Iowa.