LOS ANGELES (SPINews) -- Actress Lindsay Lohan didn't have much to say to reporters outside the courtroom when she was sentenced to serve 90-days for drugs, DUIs and dumb acting. She is, in fact, only doing two weeks and will probably get out on Sunday.
She is locked in a single cell (seen here looking out her door window) and is keeping a diary and writing songs. We have obtained a few of her notes:
July 20: This is pure hell! I'm all by myself in this dump of a cell, it's like being in the HOLE! (I saw "Shawshank Redemption" or one of those convict deals!) And these fucking NAZIS here won't even let me wear my hair extensions and false eyebrows. Hey they can't take away my LIP IMPLANTS!
July 21: It's like 3 a.m. I cry a lot, but isn't crying like therapu ... theripeudic ... therapeutic? I should be out PARTYING and DRINKING and DOING COCAINE! WTF people!
July 22: I'm gonna write some songs. Like isn't prison a really really cool place to do that? OK, like here's one: "That Bitch JT Can't Have Me!" Some words: She locks down the hall/Six feet tall/Big ass bitch/I ain't no snitch ... (I was going to make it a ballad, but I changed it to hip hop) ... I ain't no ho/I'm LiLo ...
July 24: OK, here's another song it goes like, "It's a quarter to three/There's no one in the place except me and (needs work) /And that big ass bitch get out of my face/Or I'll ... mace ... place ... space ...
July 25: My lips are like totally dry.
July 26: Two a.m. ... I wonder what Paris is up to! Now THERE'S like a badass girl!
July 27: I'm gonna write a book on PRISON REFORM. This is worse than HIGH SCHOOL and the food is like totally awful and it's all a bunch of nasty gossipy bitches and where are all the MEN, and I don't mean that stupid guard who all he wants to do is catch a shot of my snatch. Catch/snatch ... I can use that!!! Maybe I'll give him one! JUST KIDDING HA! HA! HA!
July 28: I'm gonna quit acting and go into medicine or philosophy. That guard guy is cute in a kind of overweight way. I bet he has a little dick.
July 29: Maybe a book on like the whole American CRAPPY JUSTICE SYSTEM and how it dumps on people like me because I'm rich and famous and good-looking, and I'll include the stupid war on drugs that is just filling up jails, and we oughta be like HOLLAND that sells drugs in supermarkets!!!!! (That's what J.T. shouted to me when I went out to exercise) -- ha! that's a laugh, like where are all the sexy exercise machines and there isn't even one buffed-up personal trainer or even a fat guard with the little willy.
July 30: They better not of fucked up my hair extensions and fake eyelashes!!!