The Olympics and Global Warming

VANCOUVER, B.C. (SPINews) -- Sunny, warm days during Vancouver's Winter Games have stunned the International Olympic Committee. '"Meanwhile Florida is frozen!" said IOC spokesperson, Edith Pilaf. Sacre Bleu! But scientists are not surprised. According to Climate Change Theory, major disruptions and displacements in weather are on the way. The IOC realizes the concept of distinct Summer and Winter Olympics is being turned on its head and will consolidate the games as follows:

• Opening Ceremony: Lighting of the Earth's Atmosphere.
• The 100 meter backstroke in the Bering Strait.
• The Nordic Combined at Macchu Picchu.
• The North Pole Vault.
• Ice Dancing on the Sahara.
• The Antarctic Triathlon.
• The Ecuadorian Biathlon.
• New Orleans Street Water Polo.
• The Sudan Skeleton Competition.
• The Greco-Roman Polar Bear Wrestling.
• Curling in the Amazon Basin.
• Sea Horse Dressage. 
• Synchronized Freezing.
• Quadruple Sculls on Mount Everest's Glacier Melt.
• Icicle Fencing.
• Closing Ceremony: Torch relay to the next Olympics site with a stable climate -- Mars.